91. On feminism —
Becky: "Has a woman ever not taken care of you?"
Kevin: *long pause* "Good point."
90. "We have our own Donald Trump."
— Miles, on Memphis moguls
89. "2013 was a hangover."
— Miles, acting as the narrator
88. "You look like you're ready for the Olympics!"
— homeless man, possibly blind, to Becky on a Monday night
87. "Thankfully, I'm not a vegetable today."
— Miles, on running in the Memphis heat
86. "You have enough money to burn a wet mule in a creek bed in a hurricane."
— Mike, on Kroger salaries
85. "I'm just happy in life that I can afford food."
— Quinto, on Asian takeout
84. "Quinto, goddamn, you could tear up a crowbar in a sandbox."
— Mike, on boat etiquette
83. "Have you ever killed anybody?"
— Barry, making friends
82. A personality analysis —
Becky: "Barry says I have two modes: 'Oh, I'm the queen! Bow down to me!' And 'Back off, motherfuckers.'"
Kelly: "I can see that. You're like Beyonce. You're the Irish Beyonce!"
81. "I'm doing my best."
— Siri, who was having some trouble finding the nearest McDonald's
80. "None of the Johns do the runs, right?"
— Allie, keeping it all straight
79. Drunkover - adj., "When you wake up drunk but you're hungover."
— Allie, enriching the language
78. "It's our place! There's nowhere else to go. Even though there are tons of other places to go."
— Allie, summing up our bar
77. "Weird...I thought we were the only people who brought computers here..."
— Allie, on work nights at Slider
76. "Aldo says I have the best side work of anyone."
— Barry, on birthdays
75. "That was a good episode of Slider Inn."
— Miles, on an old-school Thursday
74. "He's just stirring up Barry-ness."
— Becky, dismissively, at some bar
73. "I always keep some in the van in case I have to make a citizen's arrest."
— Aldo Sr., jack of all trades
72. On life in 2015 —
Becky: "Fifteen years ago was, like...the year 2000!"
Allie: "What? No, it wasn't!"
71. "I'm pretty sure that family is a cult."
— Allie, people-watching at the Shell
70. "Is this regular drama or Becky drama?"
— Hawaii Joe, keeping it real for the new class
69. "You're as cute as that Bud Light you're drinking."
— Slider pickup lines
68. "Tastes like unemployment."
— Becky, flashing back with a High Life
67. On the champagne of beers —
Miles: "Is that an eagle or a dragon?"
Jordan: "Yes."
66. "Music is good."
— Becky, #profoundthoughts
65. "I don't think I've had a long run shorter than 15 miles since March."
— John P., runner party small talk
64. At Schweinehaus —
Miles: "The girl who was at Frankapalooza two years ago..."
Sean (interrupting): "I don't know what any of that means."
63. "I don't think of it as your actual age. I think of it as how much life has crushed your soul."
— Bryan, explaining that app that tells you how old you are
62. "I want to drink where the people drink."
— Becky, on choosing pub crawl stops
61. "I wonder if she's done any coke today."
— Allie, asking the pertinent questions
60. People-watching —
Becky: "She's getting a little tipsy."
Barry: "Well, if you're going to fuck your grandkid..."
59. "Becky, you do attract a wide range of men."
— Molly, because it's Sunday
58. "Molly, you're as cool as your hair."
— Barry, speaking the truth
57. "I just ran the Memphis marathon backwards."
— Miles, on the drunk alphabet
56. "Wow, that's a real-life leprechaun!"
— Francesca, identifying a Slider sub-species on Paddy's Day
55. On the Grizzlies —
Becky: "Eight seconds to go and we're down by 3."
Molly: "We've got this."
54. "So you guys do hang out but you're not wrapping your legs around him?"
— Molly, getting down to brass tacks
53. "I do not even want it to be a nudist thing."
— Barry, re Shelby Farms
52. "Things always change. Because things never stay the same."
— Becky, human thesaurus
51. "Oooh! I love unbearable!"
— Molly, on summer
50. "Becky and I actually agree on something."
— Mason, on hell freezing over
49. "Even for Becky?!"
— Molly, incredulous at the "sexiest place on earth" closing for the day
48. "Give Brother Vince some respect! If he deserves any damn thing, it's that!"
— FedEx Forum's classiest Grizzlies fan
47. "So many Johns, so little time..."
— Allie, during Oktoberfest
46. "I was born at an early age."
— Jimmy, re Star Wars
45. "I forgot lately that I can wear kids clothes."
— Jordan, on the joys of cardigans
44. "Fuck the mall."
— Quinto, on women's shopping
43. "No, you are not tickling me. That needs to be established right now."
— Jimmurl, to Miles
42. "We're all different people to different people."
— Becky, philosopher extraordinaire
41. "You never want to be in a position where a very large woman can pin you with her ass."
— Barry, offering practical advice
40. "Everyone's full of shit until they're not."
— Quinto, on car sales
39. "I don't know what the hell you want from me!"
— Gavin, on coming up with good quotes
38. "I don't know what Becky did in a prior life, but she's sitting back like, 'You dumb motherfuckers.'"
— Barry
37. On perfume —
Becky: "It's Allie's signature scent."
Brad: "What's it called? Buffalo Juicy?"
36. "That 30 minutes was the closest thing to tantric sex I've ever experienced."
— Barry, on Clapton and Santana in the 1970s
35. "Just relax, and let your eyebrows grow."
— Francesca, on manscaping
34. "You're old enough to be everyone's weird uncle."
— Francesca, re Barry
33. "I had two drownings last week."
— Allie, on excitement in the workplace
32. "We should talk about how good beer is."
— Molly, on conversations about time travel
31. "Attack the head."
— Mike, on the best way to enjoy a Tuesday
30. Discussing science —
Barry: "We're just sitting here talking about how we're mostly virus."
[Slider patron]: "It's cool; I'm sweating like a rapist."
29. "Aside from killing orphans who live in Rio, this is their national pastime."
— Barry, explaining the World Cup
28. "Seeing is overrated."
— Quinto, on vacationing
27. "Where all the big-footed bitches coming from?"
— Cameron, gentleman salesman
26. "If they weren't born in a manger then you won't date them."
— Jimmurl, on courtship standards
25. "They should be arrested for impersonating a restaurant!"
— Aldo Sr., gently expressing his thoughts on Applebee's
24. "You've gotta have a good ho hauler."
— Mason, expert car buyer
23. "You're the boldest one at this table."
— Jaime, to Becky, making character assessments during Tiki Tuesday
22. "Sometimes I don't think through my decisions."
— Molly, on the perils of Thursday night
21. "I think the manager gave up tonight."
— Quinto, on the state of the Slider Inn
20. "Oh! I'll be back! I forgot it's meatball day!"
— Barry, with indecent enthusiasm, on the best part about Mondays
19. "This is like Slider church night."
— Barry, on Wednesdays being the new Thursdays
18. "We're dying from our projection of pseudo-perfection."
— Molly, paraphrasing "The Problem with Pinterest"
17. "Vibrators cured hysteria."
— Allie, on lessons from local theater
16. "Life should be lived one sip at a time."
— Aldo Sr., on the value of a good Sunday
15. "That guy can't even decide if he's gay or straight."
— Barry, life coach
14. "We got drunk and we forgot."
— Allie, summarizing the entire 2013 calendar year
13. "This didn't come out of a package so I'm not licking it."
— Becky, who regrets the situation called for her to say that
12. "I hope I'm not a twin."
— Allie, on the pitfalls of calcification
11. “I always stop at one.”
— Barry, earnestly describing his Fireball intake at the Slider Inn
10. "Dogs suck. I mean, they literally eat shit."
— Allie, guidance counselor
9. “I don’t think doctors understand legs.”
— Adrian, medical critic
8. “It’s like the hotdogs of alcohol.”
— Becky, re Fireball
7. “The first time I saw When Harry Met Sally was at Dave Wottle’s house.”
— Allie, #shitrunnerssay
6. "If you can milk a cow, you can milk anything."
— Devin, on survival in the modern world
5. “He must be gay; he can’t keep us straight.”
— Allie, on S.O.B.’s perpetually confused wait staff
4. Master pickup artists —
Allie: “I just got called ‘sir.’”
Becky: “I guess the Viva la Juicy isn’t working.”
3. "Where those little short people got killed by a volcano.”
— Scott, explaining Pompeii to Francesca
2. “14, 14, 14, 14, 14, 100.”
— Sean, on how aging works in the Asian population
1. “It ain’t just Asian chicks.”
— Sean, on whom he totes around in his Porsche
